The plan is formed.

Today, upon a lengthy consultation with the Count, some purchases were made to assist with the implementation of a grand prank upon Moriaty.

I shall not divulge the nature of this prank but to say that it will bear the hallmarks of a classic stunt: unexpected, negligible long term damage, witty implications. Oooh, the idea is making me chuckle already.

So the props... One meter of reasonably strong chain and a padlock. Everything else will be hopefully provided by an accomplice, fair Lilybee I shall be requiring your master key for an evening, unless prior opportunity can be found.

If all goes according to plan, glorious photographs shall be posted here depicting the inaugural act in the revenge of the rubber chicken!

Wish me well.